Why do you go away?

So that you can come back.

So that you can see the place you came from
with new eyes and extra colors.

And the people there see you differently, too.

Coming back to where you started
is not the same as never leaving.

―Terry Pratchett, A Hat Full of Sky

So, I was having some issues behind the scenes here— basically, I was locked out of my blogs. I’d click the link to be sent a new password, but I’ve been blogging so long now that the password was going to a now-defunct email address. It was frustrating and sort of scary while also being sort of freeing; I didn’t feel that constant guilt about not posting as frequently as I would like.

Well, as they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder, and in a short time I had an impressive list of things I really did want to write about. I harassed my hosting service with pathetic pleas for help and they did their magic. I’ve spent a few weeks cleaning up some messes in the backend, and today here I am again.

And again, I feel like my focus for this blog has shifted since the last time I really gave it some thought, but one thing I know for sure: I want to partially return to where I began, with photography and stories and mindfulness and introspection. (Even if, as least for a while, I am stuck with what I can manage to capture through the lens of my aging iPhone.)

Too many hours spent multi-tasking on a computer screen and being always a step behind, an hour beyond deadline, running late for important dates, has left me feeling stressed and scatterbrained. I crave finding connections and sharing really deep thinking, no matter how trivial it may seem.

Blogging for me began as an outlet and quickly became a job, then an obligation, then a chore.

Now? Now I hope it will be a spark. I want to get all fired up about things again.

Certain bodies… become luminous when heated.

Their luminosity disappears after some time,

but the capacity of becoming luminous afresh through heat

is restored to them by the action of a spark.

― Marie Curie