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Great loves too must be endured.
-Coco Chanel

Every year on this day, I think of how my junior year English teacher pulled me aside at the end of January to inform me that, as extra credit, I could write an essay in the voice of John Donne about Valentine’s Day.

This conversation worried at the back of mind for the next two weeks. Why did she want me to do this? I didn’t need extra credit in English, did I? As far as I knew, I was carrying a nearly perfect score in that class. Had I failed to turn something in? Was my GPA plunging without my knowing it?

And why this assignment? I hated Valentine’s Day (and still do). A day engineered to make the uncoupled feel badly about themselves, a day where those who did have significant others in their lives built up expectations that may or may not be met. A day to buy to prove our love.

Mind, I went to an all-girl school. All day long, as florists delivered their overpriced bounty, the PA would buzz on and a voice would summon so-and-so to the office to claim their evidence of being loved. It made me ill. That year, and all years, I forbade whoever I was with to buy me anything on Valentine’s Day.

Just treat me well all through the year, that’s all I ask.

So I just let the day go by. I didn’t do the extra credit assignment. And I didn’t need to, I got an A in that class. The next year that teacher and I were talking- she was writing my college recommendations for me- and she mentioned how disappointed she was that I failed to present John Donne’s speech on Valentine’s Day.

“I hate Valentine’s Day,” I told her.

“How do you think John Donne would have felt about Valentine’s Day?” she laughed.

I am two fools, I know,
For loving, and for saying so
In whining poetry.
-John Donne

Oh.
Here was a teacher, looking to tap into my sarcastic nature, giving me permission to lampoon the silly romantic customs of my peers, and I totally let that opportunity slip by.

How did she know me so well?

Anyway, I still really don’t like Valentine’s Day, the showy aspect of the whole thing, the push for commercialized cards (that are strewn all over my living room floor until I get around to gathering it up and tossing it into the bin), the enormous quantity of candy my kids consumed yesterday afternoon (I’m guessing a gallon of red food dye was involved).

Don’t get me wrong. Yes, I love, and I do try to show it. I resent being told when and how.

So, celebrating in my own way. My favorite quotes on love….

I love her and she loves me,
and we hate each other
with a wild hatred born of love.

-August Strindberg

To love abundantly is to live abundantly,
and to love forever is to live forever.

-Henry Drummond

The love we give away is the only love we keep.

-Elbert Hubbard

A great many people fall in love with or feel attracted to
a person who offers the least possibility of a harmonious union.

-Rudolph Dreikurs (psychologist)

Perfect love means to love the one
through whom one becomes unhappy.

-Soren Kierkegaard

To love is to stop comparing.

-Bernard Grasset

Oh, I have loved him too much to feel no hate for him.

-Jean Raccine

We think about sex obsessively except during the act,
when our minds tend to wander.

-Howard Nemerov

Love begets love.
This torment is my joy.

-Theodore Roethke

Love is not a sad man sitting under a tree, but a raging sword flashing with blood and fire.

-Steven Milhauser
“An Adventure of Don Juan”

The most important things are the hardest to say,
because words diminish them.

-Stephen King

Love consists in this,
that two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other.

-Rainer Maria Rilke

Enjoy your day!

I am still without a working camera, so I’ll be posting some old shots, as wells as my favorite no-known-copyright photographs from the Library of Congress. No comment on how much time I regularly spend sifting through historic photographs, I think we’ve well established how much of a nerd I am already.

On to the weekend reading…

Apparently it costs the New York Times twice as much to print the newspaper as it would to send each subscriber a free Kindle. Brilliant! Although the green-ness of the Kindle is debatable, I’m happy to accept a free one from any quarter…

37 Ways to Reuse Clothing. My favorite: making mittens out of old sweaters (cut the arms off first to make draft dodgers!)

I think this is the fifth time I’ve brought up this article, but I love it so much: Ed Begley Jr. and Bill Nye are eco-neighbors, competing to one-up each other on the eco-front. Summoning the same sense of eco-competition, some utility companies are grading customers based on peer performance. Some use smiley faces vs. frowny faces, while others give a percentage. This practice is based on a study which

left different messages on doorknobs in a middle-class neighborhood north of San Diego. One type urged the residents to conserve energy to save the earth for future generations; another emphasized financial savings. But the only kind of message to have any significant effect, Dr. Cialdini said, was one that said neighbors had already taken steps to curb their energy use.

“It is fundamental and primitive,” said Dr. Cialdini, who owns a stake in Positive Energy. “The mere perception of the normal behavior of those around us is very powerful.”

I love it! County vs. county, state vs. state…who doesn’t love winning?

PETA plays race card at dog show. I’m not even going to explain it, you’ll just have to read it for yourself. As an environmentalist, I have to say I find PETA vaguely embarrassing, but they know how to get attention.

CFLs vs. LEDs vs. incandescents: Which is the best deal overall?

Local mom does eco-good: East Coast Greening is a Delaware business run by moms, educating families on how to detox their homes. Even better, their business is steadily growing… proving that going green is possible even in a down economy.

On the same note, organic food sales are on the rise. In the wake of all the food recalls, discovering that there’s mercury in high fructose corn syrup, and I don’t even know what all, are people starting to consider where their food comes from and what goes into it?

“Mommy, Are We Poor?” An interesting article on how the recession might be good for providing youth with perspective.

Report claims video games are good for kids, boosting creativity, cooperation, and strategic reflection. Right. Also boosts nervous jitters, sibling bickering, and all-around ability to irritate parental units. (P.S. I wrote this article. Leave me a comment?)

Finally, help Audubon and the Cornell Lab of Ornithology learn more about bird populations by participating in the Great Backyard Bird Count this weekend! Click here for details.

That’s all folks! Have a good weekend!

Tragedy is when I cut my finger.

Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

-Mel Brooks

Long story short, I was interviewed for a magazine and they asked for a picture of me with the kids. Which I do not have, since I am always the one behind the camera.

So after much abuse Jeff agreed to go outside and take the picture. I get the kids cleaned up, I brush my hair (I should really do that more often), and we go out and shoot a gazillion pictures because my kids are incapable of smiling like normal human beings.

And then—

Jeff dropped my camera. Lens fully extended. Into the drippy, sloppy mud.

I’m pretty sure some condensation got behind the lens. The lens cover doesn’t shut. And even if it did, I’d be worried about the lens getting scratched- there is definitely mud in there.

So the question now is- do I pony up $200 for a new point-and-shoot? Or wait until the end of the year when I have (optimistically) saved up enough to buy a DSLR?

OK, it’s not real tragedy. But I feel like I’m missing a hand.